THE DAY THE INFATUATION DIED

When I first saw him, I never even thought of knowing him or even knowing his name. He struck me like the first streak of lightning after a rainless season of a seemingly endless drought. He stood out amongst the hundreds of people around us. He’s unique. He’s one of a kind.

And so, the unexpected happened. He suddenly became closer than I thought or even expect of. He’s within my grasp. He’s technically two inches away from me. And still I can’t do anything about it. I guess, with all this crap, the most painful experience is when thinking of you can almost do anything but just because you think more about yourself and how other people see you … you can’t do shit about something. All you can do is fantasize … mentally conjure possible “futures” for the two of you, or look from a distance …. Smile …. Cringe … then … move on with your day to day activities.

But as if I was left with no choice, I was as vulnerable as a dog howling during full moon. I couldn’t help it. It’s the way I see him and it’s the way he sees me. He has this demeanor that can totally disarm me in a split second. He wouldn’t bat an eye lash, he knows how I feel towards him yet I don’t feel any defense mechanism or even awkwardness and that made everything even more harsh and complicated.

And although I have thought that this mere infatuation would lead me nowhere and that the probability was like hitting a $260 M jackpot in the lottery in a lifetime, I still nurtured and, worse, tried to pursue it, with the selfless thought that MAYBE something might change and that I would be lucky by him reciprocating the strong feelings I have toward him.

The good part was I knew that this was coming and it’ll lead to a disaster… the bad part was ….. I didn’t do anything about it …. And I just keep on holding on.

And it was just because I LIKED HIM. I liked seeing him. I liked talking to him. I liked being with him.
Luckily, I was equipped with enough bitterness and with enough heartaches that I let myself turn the silly infatuation off. It’s one skill that I am proud that I have and one skill that I have perfect through hard times. All I needed was a BIG RED SIGN TO STOP …. And that flashed in front of me undoubtingly telling me to FORGET ALL ABOUT IT.

It was not easy.

But, at least now, I am very confident to say … that I have experienced the day the infatuation died.

AHT UPDATE

AHT YESTERDAY

	CS	BB	COMBINED
Billy Bautista	351		351
Edmund Lester Cedeño	300	353	337
John Erwin Pabalate	419	354	385
Julie Chico	523		523
Julio Crisanto Bautista	322	287	296
Kimberly Dominguez			#DIV/0!
Lordrick Villame			#DIV/0!
Lorraine Ann Narciso	352	379	366
Ma Lourdes Macaranas	359	348	352
Maria Vanessa Patiño			#DIV/0!
Nathaniel David			#DIV/0!
Patrick Evangelista	423		423
Rodolfo Manongsong			#DIV/0!
Shella Espia	240		240
Steve Santos	365		365
TEAM			364

AHT RUNNING FOR THE WEEK (Nov 15 - 16)

We'r running in TWO DAYS in the week ... and AHT does not look GOOD

	CS	BB	COMBINED
Billy Bautista	391		391
Edmund Lester Cedeño	347	356	354
John Erwin Pabalate	390	362	375
Julie Chico	475		475
Julio Crisanto Bautista	345	306	314
Kimberly Dominguez			#DIV/0!
Lordrick Villame	424		424
Lorraine Ann Narciso	371	410	394
Ma Lourdes Macaranas	375	392	386
Maria Vanessa Patiño			#DIV/0!
Nathaniel David			#DIV/0!
Patrick Evangelista	382		382
Rodolfo Manongsong			#DIV/0!
Shella Espia	240		240
Steve Santos	365		365
TEAM			378